Lisa’s memorial service was today. It was both very joyful & hopeful while also being sad.
I don’t think it’s sunk in yet for me. That there will be no more memories made with Lisa here on earth. It might not sink in that she is gone and just not moved geographically until it’s a few years out, when all of my friends and I grow older and my idea of Lisa is frozen in time.
The service was wonderful. Point blank asking what Lisa would ask of each of us. “What are you going to choose? In this moment of sadness, are you going to turn to God? Or are you going to turn from God?”
She was never shy about calling people out. Pointing out truth. In moments of sorrow, our hope is in turning to God.
2 responses to “Joyful Weeping”
I get what you mean about “it might not sink in that she is gone… until it’s a few years out, when all of my friends and I grow older and my idea of Lisa is frozen in time.”
To me, my mom will always be 39. It is weird for me to think about turning 40 in 10 years and PASSING my mom in age. Or to consider how old she would be now (53).
As I get set to turn 30 soon, I think this is part of why it’s been so strange to me. I am entering the decade in which she died. At 15, 39 seemed old… but suddenly it seems so young! Not only that, but she was 29 when she was first diagnosed with cancer (which seemed ancient when I was 5…). There is a part of me that feels like turning 30 and being cancer-free is a victory for me. I can’t really explain it, but it’s definitely something that’s been on my mind a lot.
Lisa’s death has brought a lot of this to the forefront of my thoughts. Like my mom (and an uncle), Lisa was ONLY in her 30s. Lisa’s struggles these last few months and her death have been a reminder to me to live life abundantly TODAY, to seek to honor God TODAY, to set aside the petty things of this world and focus on what is truly, eternally important TODAY.
Thank you, again, for sharing Lisa with me, Debra! I’m praying for you!
Thanks for all of your Prayers Vicky. I wish so many things were different, such as Lisa feeling better in November when you were.
It is hard to believe/think about you “Passing” your mom soon… wow. And yes, back when we were 15, 39 seemed so long off. Now we are right there, almost, or already in the 30s. Like Lisa, your Mom was so young.